ALWAYS

i'll be loving you..........ALWAYS

not for just an hour,

not for just a day,

not for just a year,

but ALWAYS.

THOMAS MICHAEL

Thomas,

thomas michael starts preschool tomorrow. he's growing up so quickly. he talks about you all the time. he keeps your woody woodpecker puppet you had as a boy on his bed. he showed it to someone and they laughed and made the silly sound woody made and he said, " don't laugh, this was pop pop's toy".

he plays soccer now. really likes it.

TO ALL

to all who have loved thomas i say that i am sorry for your loss and pain.

do not think for a minute that i am only aware of my loss.

thank you to everyone who has ever cherished my husband.

BIRTHDAY, DEATHDAY, LIFEDAY (ONE YEAR)

today, your birthday, marks one year since you turned your head, opened your eyes with a look of awe and breathed your last breath when Jesus called you home.

we love you and miss you. your grandson made sure we had a birthday cake for PopPop.

you left footprints of faith and courage and honour to God. we will never be the same without you, yet we have to be willing to leave our own footprints.

thomas, look for me someday when i am called home.

your patricia ann

FATHER'S DAY

today we were reminded about what we already knew......God is in control and is our Heavenly Father, yet life without Thomas will never be the same for my children. the loss they feel is intense. they miss him so very much. we are at times frozen in grief and it hurts when HE continues to pry our fingers off the grief. we recognize how many people have experienced this same pain of loss. letting go is not easy. grateful we have the many memories of a man who loved his children more than himself. thank you Jesus even for this sorrow.

WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

Today, at 6:05 PM, 28 years ago, my father walked me down the aisle at crestmont christian and missionary alliance church in aliquippa, pa to meet my soon to be companion for life, Thomas.

today i spent my first anniversary without him. i lit our memory candle and put our wedding album out. my children stayed with me all day and prepared a nice dinner. we had thomas' favorite dessert, strawberries and angel food cake.

as i looked through the album i noticed those who have gone on. a beloved aunt, a cousin, pastor
mock who married us and now my sweetheart. my throat aches with the memories. i cannot take thomas' hand and grow old with him, yet i can begin to become more grateful for the years we did have.

MOTHER'S DAY

my first mother's day without the beloved, incredible father of my children and grandson.

the absence of his presence is difficult to describe. my heart aches for my children and grandson now that the reality of his going is being fully realized.

thomas michael talks about his Pop Pop almost every day. he has such a healthy attitude about his pop pop that is in heaven with Jesus, yet he was found weeping one morning saying he missed him.